"A fool's lips enter into contention, and his mouth calleth for strokes.
A fool's mouth is his destruction, and his lips are the snare of his soul.
The words of a talebearer are as wounds, and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly."
(Proverbs 18:6-8, KJV)
Fools often walk about as if they know what they are saying or talking about. Many words does not a wise man make. Just because someone can talk a lot does not mean he/she has a clue what he/she is talking about. The mouth can often tell you things people don't want you to know. How many times do people say exactly what they mean when they try not to?
"I don't mean to sound rude..." then they go about being rude.
"I don't mean to be mean..." then they are mean.
"I don't mean to get involved..." then they get involved.
"I don't mean to stick my nose into this..." then they stick their nose into it.
"I don't mean to influence your decision..." then they tell you something to influence your decision.
If you don't mean to get involved or influence the decision, don't. Be quiet. If you feel the need to throw an "I don't mean" in there you probably know you shouldn't say what you are about to say, so don't. It is often a lot more difficult to be quiet than to say many words.
I actually had to look up what a talebearer is, it is a person that gossips. Their words are as wounds! Words are weapons! Remember that!
If you have to say things such as, "Don't tell anyone but...," "You didn't hear this from me," or "Keep this a secret," then you probably shouldn't be saying it at all. Our conscience often rears up in an attempt to correct us and the words slip out because we know we aren't suppose to be doing something. Sometimes we say "I don't mean" or "You didn't hear this from me," as an attempt to curb the feelings of guilt. Just don't say it. I am guilty of it myself. You can be hurting more people than you realize in worse than you know in more ways than you know. It's a trap. Don't get ensnared but maybe instead next time, just don't say anything at all.
You don't always have to offer your opinion.